AITA for not confronting my coworker and for hiding that our boss was actually my cousin?

This happened years ago, when I was younger and working as an office manager at a massage and reflexology clinic owned by my cousin. At the time, I thought it was just a simple job helping with scheduling, phone calls, organizing payments, and making sure the business side of things ran smoothly. But the longer I stayed, the messier things got — all because of one woman.

The clinic had several people working there, but one in particular stood out. She was the main massage therapist and reflexologist, and honestly, she loved being the center of attention. She was one of those people who could talk for hours, telling stories, boasting about her skills, and fishing for compliments. Clients often stayed around to chat with me at the front desk after their sessions, and I could feel her annoyance whenever attention shifted away from her.

At first, I brushed it off. I thought maybe she was just a little insecure. But then she started doing small things that made it clear she wanted to establish herself as more than just an employee.

One day she came into the office with a contract in hand, sat down next to me, and started explaining that she had a percentage of ownership in the business. “So, you see,” she said, “I’m also a boss here.” She was clearly trying to assert dominance, to make sure I understood my place. What she didn’t know — and what I never told her — was that the real owner of the clinic was my cousin. She had no idea we were related. I just smiled politely and let her explain, pretending I didn’t fully grasp what she was saying.

Another time, she showed me a sheet of paper where she had written down all the things she had supposedly done for the clinic and, in comparison, all the things my cousin “failed” to do. It was like she was keeping score in some imaginary battle for importance.

Then came the infamous photocopy incident. One day, she asked me to make copies of several documents for her. Without realizing it, she had slipped that “scorekeeping” sheet in with the rest. I copied it along with everything else and set it aside. She later realized what she had handed me and immediately panicked, asking if I had copied that sheet too. I told her no — that there was no reason for me to do that. She looked so relieved, like she had just dodged a bullet. But of course, I had copied it, and I quietly kept it.

If that wasn’t enough, she also had this habit of pretending she was the most dedicated worker in the place. She’d arrive maybe five minutes before me in the morning, pick up a mop, and when I walked in she’d sigh dramatically and say something like, “I’ve been here for hours, cleaning and preparing everything.” It was laughable, but she said it so seriously that someone who didn’t know better might have believed her.

But the real nightmare was that she wasn’t just a therapist — she was also a teacher. She gave reflexology and massage lessons on the side, and because I was the office manager, she decided that meant I was also her personal assistant. She constantly roped me into arranging her lessons, printing schedules, and preparing teaching materials. At first it was small favors, like making copies of handouts. Then it escalated.

One day she brought me a book and asked me to type out sections for her so she could use them in class. I thought that was ridiculous — typing entire chapters? Instead, I scanned the pages and fixed the OCR errors. When I gave the materials back to her, she acted impressed and even pitied me, saying something like, “Oh, poor you, you must have worked so hard typing all this.” Because I was young and a bit naive, I admitted that I hadn’t typed it, I had scanned it.

That was my mistake. From then on, she constantly came to me with books or papers to scan and edit for her. And every time I gave her the completed work, she’d make some backhanded comment like, “Oh, you didn’t really work much, you just scanned it.” It was maddening. She wanted me to do the work, but also wanted to minimize the effort I put in, so I never got any credit.

Over time, she became more toxic. She started telling our boss — my cousin — that I was stealing money from the clinic. Can you imagine? After all the times I helped her, after all the favors, she tried to sabotage me.

When my cousin confronted me, I finally explained everything. I told her the woman had no idea we were related and that I had kept quiet about it to avoid unnecessary drama. I also pulled out the photocopy of that sheet where she had written all her complaints and “evidence” against my cousin. My cousin was shocked, but also grateful I had kept that copy.

Still, by that point I was done. I told my cousin I couldn’t keep working there. The woman’s behavior was too toxic, and I didn’t want to spend my days defending myself against her lies. I quit shortly after, and I honestly felt relieved.

Looking back, though, I sometimes wonder if I was wrong. Maybe I should have confronted her from the beginning, instead of pretending not to know what she was doing. Maybe I should have told her outright that the boss was my cousin. Maybe if I had set firmer boundaries, things wouldn’t have escalated so far.

But at the same time… she was manipulative, entitled, and constantly trying to undermine both me and my cousin. She thrived on creating drama. Would confronting her early on have changed anything? Or would it just have made her more vicious?

So AITA for never telling her the truth about who really owned the business, and for deciding to quit instead of confronting her directly?